By Rob Holbert Managing Editor

If you think it’s tough selling a house, try selling one during the recent crime spree taking place in Mobile. It’s nearly impossible to impress potential buyers when someone is standing out in the neighbor’s yard with a pistol to the lawn guy’s head.

It’s got to be that. Or maybe no one wants to live in my former home out of fear some angry reader will throw a flaming bag of dog poop onto their new porch by mistake. (For the record, that is easily handled if you keep a shovel handy. Never, ever stomp! Trust me.)

I suppose I can understand that as a possible reason for someone not immediately snapping up our well priced, three-bedroom, three-bath home in the lovely garden district. Did I mention it’s priced to move? Perhaps I did. But I’m not really trying to write about real estate here.

It’s crime that’s my focus this issue. If you live around here, it’d be tough not to notice an increase in criminal activity all over town. Suddenly armed robberies, thefts and muggings have become commonplace, and not just at Government Plaza. (Rimshot please!) It’s happening in Spring Hill, Midtown, at the Loop, and in Oakleigh and LoDa.

We’ve had news stories in all forms of media about people wearing “hoodies” to commit crimes, which seems unnecessarily frightening. Anyone waving a .38 Special is scary enough without having an Insane Clown Posse hoodie over his face. It’s bad enough to be robbed. I don’t want to wet my pants at the same time, too. Can’t we just go back to bandanas and monkey masks fellas?

I know of businesses that have had crooks cut holes in the ceiling at night to steal the weekend’s receipts. And at least one person opening a new business that will stay open at night, expressed to one of our writers a fear that she’ll be held up as soon as the place opens. How’s that for putting a lead outline on a silver cloud? Business is tough enough without having to factor in how many days employees will miss while recovering from gunshot wounds.

Now I’m no law enforcement official although I do occasionally use a fake badge to pull people over on deserted roads, but it seems clear something is dramatically different than it was not so long ago. There have been plenty of news stories where local leaders say statistically crime isn’t really any different than it’s been, but we all know that’s not really the case. Maybe there is the same amount of crime around town, but different people are being victimized.

It’s one thing when two people engaged in haggling over the price of a bag of meth (meth does come in bags, doesn’t it?) stab each other outside a juke joint in a bad part of town. It’s a whole different kettle of fish when someone holds up a Smoothie King or the Blockbuster. No one wants to die while renting “Knocked Up” or trying to decide whether to add protein to a shake.

While the knee-jerk thing to do here is to blame the police, I’m not sure that’s the right thing to do. In speaking with some rank-and-file officers about the situation, they admit to feeling a bit undermanned when it comes to performing routine patrols. Six or seven officers patrolling the First Precinct, for instance, spreads them pretty thin.

Now, whether it’s effective to have our officers out conducting roadblocks every weekend instead of patrolling, is an entirely different matter. Lets face it, the road blocks are announced ahead of time and generally just serve to give out lots of tickets for expired licenses, tags and insurance. Sure, occasionally they get a drunk or two, but probably no more than they’d get patrolling the streets. On the other hand, the criminals have a really good idea where the cops are when a roadblock is set.

It’s pretty clear we need more police officers on the streets. The city’s growing, both through annexation and in the number of people visiting. The mayor and city council need to find ways to get more police out there, or do something to stop people from moving into town, especially if they have Insane Clown Posse hoodies in their wardrobes.

But I’m not even sure all this is just particular to Mobile. This past weekend I visited my parents on the Mississippi Gulf Coast and read in the Biloxi paper about four bank robberies they’ve had within a couple of days. Officials there were also bemoaning an increase in crime.

So maybe it’s part of the pending recession. Maybe some regional gang just graduated a whole new class of criminals and they’re earning their stripes.

As citizens there are some things we need to do to help combat the problem. The first is always carry a loaded pistol and shoot wildly at anything that looks slightly suspicious. After a few of these thugs are blown away – along with a couple of Jehovah’s Witnesses and all of the insane Press-Register street hawkers – the underworld with get the hint.

OK, that might not be responsible advice. Instead we need to be vigilant and call police when something looks strange. We also need to let our elected officials know we expect the police to be equipped properly to combat the problem. And that includes having the necessary numbers to patrol more effectively.

With ThyssenKrupp and EADS making huge investments in the area, we have to make sure our city is as pleasant a place to live as possible. Letting crime get out of control at a time when we’re having so much financial success would be idiotic. Especially if it makes selling my house harder.

Join the Discussion

Rob Holbert is Lagniappe managing editor. Contact him at rholbert@lagniappemobile.com.

Archives