Mobile Magnified

Hello, my little gossip-hungry freakazoids! How were your Easters? Did you find the golden egg? If so, let’s hope you used protection. OK, I don’t even know what that means. I think it’s supposed to be some sort of euphemism. I’m filthy. And I drink a lot. I can’t help it. Let’s get down to business.

Someone call a doctor for the Doctor

The ZEW’s first Zewtopia festival, out at the fairgrounds on Saturday, April 15, was amazing. The weather was perfect; the crowd was wonderfully attentive and excited, and the music was great.

All day drinking did not keep many from seeing the festival’s headliner, Dr. John, who it seemed like took forever to get on stage. But once he did, he seemed well, a little off. People were like, “is he drunk?” And then someone would laugh, and say, “oh probably, he’s from New Orleans, that’s what they do.” Yes, that’s what THEY do, you clean-livin’ Mobilians. (Eye roll)

Anyway, don’t get me wrong, it was still a fantastic show, but I was worried about the good doctor and rightly so. My secret backstage spy told me poor Dr. John was sick as a dog, suffering from the stomach flu and according to this same spy, for some reason his leg was also bleeding on the stage. That’s kind of nasty, but oh well, it was still a wonderful day! Let’s just hope Dr. J has a little nurse at home to tend to his open sores.

Simply stated

The State of the County and City address on Wednesday, April 12 went swimmingly. Of course, they had their hokey videos about how great things are. Commissioner Steve “the Hammer” or “The Commish” Nodine waxing on and on about parks and such, and Council President Reggie Copeland talking up what a great team the current council is. He thankfully did not call Mayor Sam Jones their quarterback, as he did during the first few days after the election and in every speech he gave during Jones’ inauguration.

I guess the biggest shock was when Commission President Juan Chastang announced in his address that the county was going to build a high-rise condo across from the Museum of Mobile, where the old courthouse was and where I thought the new Mardi Gras Park was going. It must have taken everyone by surprise, including at least one other commissioner. After the ceremony someone asked Nodine, “so you guys are building a condo downtown?” The Hammer replied, “I guess we are now.”

But anyway, it was lovely affair, sponsored by the Mobile Area Chamber of Commerce. The meal was a grilled chicken salad, with pecan pie fro dessert. And I swear to the God of Gossip, a man who looked exactly like Little Richard was serving the head table.

Good Golly, Miss Molly! Let’s hope times haven’t gotten that tough for the little pocket piano man.

Boozie’s new digs

The Lagniappe offices have been located for the past couple of years downtown at The Tower at Ryan Park. We’ve loved it there, with drunken Christmas parties on the roof, complete with inappropriate behavior under the mistletoe and such. Rob dressing up like Santa and asking everyone to sit in his lap. Sean Sullivan gladly complying.

But we’ve been growing and now there’s just not enough room for us in our little office anymore. So we’re packing it up and relocating to 1407 Government St.,across from AmSouth Bank and Krispy Kreme, which will be good when I need to feed my alcoholic sugar cravings. It’s a cool house, and everyone’s excited we won’t be on top of each other anymore. Well, everyone except Rob and Sean.

But the Lagniappe powers that be have promised to let me throw some parties there and such, so it should be cool. So if you were planning on stopping by to say “hi” or “go to hell,” remember to head to the new digs in Leinkauf. We should be open for business there by Monday, May 1.

A Boozie nation

Hey kids, while I love my trusted spies, I need your help. I know some of you are out there every night, roaming the streets and dirt roads of Mobile and Baldwin counties, and you’re seeing epic misbehavior. It’s just too much area for one drunken little gossip columnist to cover. And you know those cheap bastards and Lagniappe won’t help pay any of my bar tabs or bail me out of jail, so I can’t be everywhere all the time.

I’ll stop whining now, but what I need for you is to enlist in the Army of Boozie. All I need you to do is e-mail tips to me at boozie@lagniappemobile.com. It’s completely anonymous and the gossip gods will smile down upon you.

In sadness

At deadline, I was heartbroken to hear about the death of one of LoDa’s most vibrant personalities, William Chesser, who died in his sleep of an apparent heart attack early Sunday morning at the young age of 38.

William’s art gallery, which also doubled as his hair salon, across from Cathedral Square had become a major part of the downtown arts community and the place to be during the LoDa Artwalks.

I don’t think I’ll ever be able to walk by there again without hearing his warm voice say, “Hey Honey.”

Thankfully, there is already talk of keeping the gallery open and in his name by turning it into a co-op for other local artists, cementing the mark he made on the downtown he loved.

His funeral will be in his hometown of Red Level, Ala., but there are plans for a local memorial service, although at press time they had not been set.

He will be greatly missed by downtown and this columnist.

Well kids, that’s all for this issue. Remember whether it’s rain or shine, dramatic or scandalous, or just some plain ol’ leg wound lovin’, I will be there. Ciao.

Boozie Beer Nues is Lagniappe social butterfly. Contact her at boozie@lagniappemobile.com.

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