By Rob Holbert Managing Editor

Has it dawned on anyone else that we appear to have a serious judge problem around here? It’s becoming increasingly obvious that some of our local judges believe their black robes entitle them to do pretty much whatever in the hell they want – without repercussion.

Cast your memories back not so long ago to a time when it was discovered Mobile’s Municipal Court judges had just arbitrarily expunged thousands of cases, despite the fact there wasn’t a single line of law anywhere giving them such authority. When they were called on it, a higher court judge told them they’d have to stop, but then he tried to block the public from seeing the cases the municipal judges had illegally expunged. How’s that for protecting the brotherhood of the robe?

Of course the latest and most egregious example of judicial hubris is the goofiness surrounding local pariah and former school board president David Thomas’ recent trip(s) to jail. I’ll recount this briefly for those who’ve been asleep or rush to vomit every time David Thomas’ name is mentioned. (I find Pepto-Bismol quite calming when reading about David, by the way.)

David Thomas was sentenced to spend a week in Mobile County Jail as part of his string of idiotic offenses committed over the past year. When it came time to do his time, David’s distant cousin, good friend, pen pal, and fellow member of the fraternal order of stupid public behavior, Circuit Court Judge Herman Thomas, pulled strings and got sweet Dave a spot at the Prichard Jail instead of Metro. I’ve never spent a night in the slammer, but word is it’s sort of a Mayberry versus Attica type of thing in terms of differences with Metro. Naturally, David wanted to stay somewhere where his silk jammies and 500-count sheets wouldn’t arouse suspicion.

Enough about David, though. I’m beginning to get nauseous. The gist here is what Hermie-baby did. He apparently went out of his way to intentionally countermand an order by fellow Circuit Court Judge “Rusty” Johnston that David Thomas serve his time in Metro, giving special treatment to his good buddy Dave. When this ruse was discovered, Judge Herman apparently complicated things by slinging around a few denials and severely stretched truths.

And here’s where things get really tricky.

When the local media heat came down on Judge Thomas, he first tried to weasel his way out with some obvious fabrications. Then in stepped Presiding Circuit Court Judge Charles Graddick, who told the Press-Register he’d launched an investigation into the matter, even going so far as to speak with the Administrative Office of Courts in Montgomery and the offices of the Chief Justice of the Alabama Supreme Court in order to see what he should do.

Graddick was quoted saying, “Rest assured, I am going to have a candid conversation with him. What has been brought to my attention disturbs me greatly, as I know it does my other colleagues on the bench, as well as the citizens of Mobile County.”

The next day, Graddick told the Press-Register he’d talked with Herman and Herman admitted he’d been the one who called the Metro Jail to get the order sent so David could sleep in the rape-free Prichard jail. He said Herman promised never to do it again. (Hey, try that one next time you’re in “Charcoal Charlie’s” courtroom. “I promise never to do it again, your honor.” Case dismissed!)

But, darn the luck, Graddick said he’d discovered he has no official capacity to sanction one his judges. Graddick did offer that any citizen who believed Herman Thomas had violated the Canons of Judicial Ethics, which govern judges, could file a complaint with the state Judicial Inquiry Commission requesting an investigation. Graddick acted like his hands were tied and threw it back on John Q. Public to do the dirty work.

Well, being the curious type, I called Margaret Childers, executive director of Alabama’s Judicial Inquiry Commission, and asked her if Charlie Graddick could request an investigation of Judge Thomas. You know what she said? You guessed it – he can. She said it is most certainly one of his options. And actually, under the very Canons of Judicial Ethics that supposedly govern our ungovernable judges, Charcoal Charlie is really duty-bound to do so. Letting Herman slide shouldn’t be an option for him.

Part B, section 3 of the Canon’s Administrative Duties section states: “A judge should take or initiate appropriate disciplinary measures against a judge or lawyer for unprofessional conduct of which the judge has personal knowledge.”

Seems to me Herman Thomas’ confession to Graddick that he called the jail clears the personal knowledge of unprofessional conduct hurdle.

But instead of officially asking for an inquiry into Herman’s horrible breach of ethics, Graddick decided to wring his hands and fire off some cool new rules for his judges. Well, that ought to fix that! Surprisingly, Graddick didn’t return a call seeking his explanation for not initiating an investigation of Herman Thomas’ actions.

What’s even more shocking than Herman Thomas’ egregious flouting of what should be the rock-hard ethical standards of his office, is that he’s going to get away with it. And his fellow judges aren’t going to do squat about it. That’s up to you, Joe Citizen. “The Law” is taking a powder on this one.

Who knows why no one will step up and do the right thing? Maybe Graddick and Thomas are buddies. Maybe they gavel-swap when no one else is looking. But more likely it’s just the kind of professional courtesy many judges in Mobile are afforded by one another. Their motto should be: “Do what you want. If you’re wearing black – we got your back.”

Rob Holbert is Lagniappe managing editor. Contact him at rholbert@lagniappemobile.com.

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