Oh lord, y’all. I think I am just now getting over my Nappie Awards hangover. Yep, I’m pretty sure the Boozester definitely may have lost one of her last two brain cells. And my spies, oh my spies, they were misbehaving more than I have ever seen, so they are all getting raises, of course. Their usual payment of a six pack of the Beast will now be raised to Natty Light! Boozie is a giver. Just know that.
Well anyway, let’s get to all the Nappie-licious goodness!
It’s Nappie Time!
On Thursday July 25, around 1,000 people joined the staff of Lagniappe at the Saenger Theatre as we celebrated 11 years of Keeping Mobile Funky. It was the biggest crowd to date. The cocktail hour included delicious heavy appetizers by Chef Rob & Co and busy, busy bartenders.
Congressional hopefuls Bradley Byrne (Nappie Winner for Next Congressman), Quin Hilyer, Wells Griffith, Daniel Dyas and I believe Jessica James were all in attendance, as was District 2 Mobile City Council candidate Lakeshia Dotson. There may have been others but that’s all the spies reported seeing and again most of them were drunk by 7. Mobile County Sheriff Sam Cochran also stopped by and mayoral candidate Sandy Stimpson made a late appearance to accept his Nappie Award, as readers voted for “One Mobile” over “Too Busy to be Divided.”
Speaking of politicos, District Attorney Ashley Rich was unable to attend, but sent an acceptance video. These Nappies are getting fancy y’all! Next year maybe someone can accept live via satellite.
Joe Cain and his band of followers made a grand appearance, along with his admiring mistresses dressed in red. Best Drag Queen Performer Ms. Venus looked amazing as usual and was pleased to announce the documentary on her will be finished soon.
The awards show started off with a surprise performance by Mobile’s own Prancing Elites, who recently gained worldwide fame on the Interweb after a video of one of their performances went viral after Shaquille O’Neal tweeted it, receiving nearly half a million hits. They even had a reporter with them who had flown in from NYC to do a piece on them for Time magazine. They were amazing and had the crowd screaming.
After the Elites’ stellar performance, the Nappie Award video featured a puppet show starring puppet Nicolas Cage and puppet Danny Glover. Apparently Puppet Cage felt he should be the next mayor of Mobile. There was puppet sex and puppet violence and puppet tampering with police records. Lagniappe’s film critic Asia Frey gave it two thumbs up!
Another highlight of the evening and a first for the Nappie Awards came when a gentleman in love proposed to his longtime girlfriend on stage. The proposer, James, contacted Lagniappe several months in advance to arrange this very special surprise. His soon-to-be bride Susana just thought she was there with her company, SunnySide Theater, who was there to receive a Nappie. Before the first award was given she was called up on stage by Lagniappe’s co-publisher Ashley Trice to accept a “new Nappie award” for “Person Most Likely to Be Surprised at the 2013 Nappie Awards.” After she was given this “award,” James came out and got down on one knee and asked her to be his wife. She accepted … thankfully. The crowd screamed, especially their families, many who had flown in to be there. We are so happy for them and glad they let us be a part of their lives. We better get a wedding invite!
Many of our local news “celebs” were in attendance as well, including FOX 10’s Bob Grip (Best Evening Newscast), Joe Emer (Sexiest Local Newsman), Michael White (Best Morning Newscast), Chasity Byrd and Cherish Lombard (Sexiest Local Newswomen, No. 1 and 2, respectively). Nappie Award winner for Best Anchor Mel Showers, Best Meteorologist Alan Sealls and Best Sports Reporter Randy Patrick were there to accept their awards for WKRG.
WNTM talk radio host Uncle Henry (DJ Whose Voice Leads You to Believe You want to see HIM naked) accepted his award in what appeared to be disgust and enjoyed some friendly trash talking from WABD’s Q-Tip, last year’s winner for the Naked DJ coveted award, as he and Blondie accepted their award for Best Morning Show.
Blondie who received the DJ Whose Voice Leads You to Believe You want to see HER naked award revealed she was really just a cat lady. Sean and Wayne from FMTalk 106.5 were pleased to pick up their award for Best Talk Radio Hosts, as were 95KSJ’s Dan and Shelby, who won Best DJ Team. The Zew’s Tim Camp, LeeAnn Waters and Shane Schoenher accepted their award for Favorite Radio Station. This marks their 11th win in a row. Talk about category dominance!
The next two hours saw many of the nearly 200 winners accepting their awards and making kind (or not-so-kind) remarks. Best Singer Holli Mosley and Best Guitar Player Dale Drinkard rocked it with a performance of two of their songs together. And Best Bartender Cheryl Shifflet proved why she is the best, as she accepted her Nappie, she poured herself, Rob and Ashley shots of tequila. And they were NOT baby shots. Ouch!
The after party at the rooftop pool at the Battle House hotel was fabulous. As people arrived, they noticed one gentleman had already jumped in the pool. He had not bothered to take off the full dress suit he was wearing. Later in the evening, more folks, as expected, jumped in the pool with varying degrees of clothing on, including a dip by Mobile’s Most Eligible Bachelor, who may have given those around him a brief glimpse of why he was chosen (cryptic enough for you?). Lee Yankie provided the tunes under the purple glow of the RSA Tower, which was lighted in Lagniappe’s “signature color” for the evening.
We always have a good time at the Nappies. But we are always glad they only come around once a year. Thanks to everyone for making it possible and for all those who came and helped make it funky!
A new “infestation” at Termite Hall
We hear the spirit of Eugene Walter may be filling Termite Hall again soon. “Rumor” has it there are some top secret talks to bring back something in which Walter would most definitely approve. It will be by invitation only and those invites will go to the most talented folks representing the arts community from every generation. Talk about cryptic, but we promise to have more details soon.
Well kids, that’s all I have for now. Just remember, whether rain or shine, dramatic or scandalous, or some plain ol’ Nappie lovin’, I will be there. Ciao!