Y’all, it’s already Christmas — how in the world did we get here? Wasn’t it just Halloween? Luckily my holiday spirit was in full swing earlier in the month because now it has died down and I haven’t even finished decorating. But luckily for y’all I have still been in Christmas party mode, so consider this holiday gossip my gift to you! You’re welcome!

Ho, ho, ho and a bottle of rum
Lagniappe’s annual Christmas party was last Thursday night, and like always the bosses know how to throw a party and spoil us all at the same time. I’ve yet to attend a Lagniappe party that I didn’t enjoy. I mean, we just know how to have a good time!

In years past we have “pregamed” at one location then moved to another for the party, but this year we started and finished at The Royal Scam, which happens to be one of Boozie’s favorite places. How could it not be everyone’s? The food is top-notch and the drinks are always delicious.

Anyways, the night started out with some of those delicious drinks and catching up with the folks who work outside the office. After cocktails and mingling, food was brought out, and since Royal Scam’s food is top-notch, like I said, everyone was ready with plate and fork in hand.

Out first was a warm crab dip served with also-warm pita chips. I could have poured that stuff on everything. Next was beef tenderloin and toast points. I personally skipped the bread for the tenderloin and used it for the crab dip.

Then while I was standing there they brought out crocché, which is basically Italian for fried mashed potatoes, but better! See, I don’t eat potatoes unless they’re chips or french fries, which I will be picky about, so I was reluctant to try these, but man, I’m glad I did! They were my second favorite thing at the party … well, third if we’re being technical. My margarita was my second fav and yes, I was drinking a margarita but it also started a margarita trend!

I’m not done with the food. In the back of the room was a shrimp and cucumber salad, pickled veggies — the jalapeño carrots were on point, but the main attraction was the tuna martini platter! I could have eaten the whole platter by myself.

After food was our annual game of Dirty Santa, and let’s just say there was nothing dirty about it this year. In years past gifts included a douchebag, Kinky vodka, a swimsuit calendar and other unwanted gifts. I guess this year people wanted to play it safe and didn’t want to risk any lawsuits. I brought wine but hey, I’m all about the booze!

The first two gifts were alcohol, the next dish towels and then the prized gift, an old fashioned kit! More alcohol, a hat that said “whisky makes me frisky”, CRU rum from Atmore, a hairy-belly fanny pack with Gentleman Jack (because it’s fitting), John Emerald single malt whiskey from Opelika, some more wine, some wine with nuts and sausage, and more alcohol.

I was last again this year and wasn’t sure what to pick; there were only two dead items but I decided on the dish towels. I already had plenty of wine stocked up at home and I’m not much of a whiskey drinker. Plus the person who brought the dish towels hated them and they were funny! So like many other times, I got the party started, many people started stealing and few were left with their original gift.

Even though the Lagniappe game of Dirty Santa wasn’t all that dirty this year, there was an appearance by a real life Dirty Santa. Yes, that’s right. The big man himself showed up. Or at least someone dressed like him. We are not exactly sure if this Santa was the real deal, as he appeared to be 8 feet tall and his belly did not shake like a bowl full of jelly. And that’s probably for the best because a whole lot of Lagniappers would have ended up on the naughty list.

After Santa went back to the North Pole, some Lagniappers headed to The Haberdasher but I headed home. After drinking vodka, tequila and beer, I knew Friday wasn’t going to be pretty.

Other holiday fun
While us Lagniappe folks were celebrating the holidays, it was reported that a goat was spotted in a car parked at Mary G. Montgomery during the middle school band concert. Umm, yeah, a goat and a dog were left in the car. I mean, it wasn’t hot but it also isn’t normal … but then again, it is Semmes.

If the goat wasn’t strange enough, on Saturday during the DIP Christmas parade a few folks caught the best throws of all, miniatures! Hey, only on DIP, but those are my type of throws! Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Holidays, Season’s Greetings and everything else!

Well, kids, that’s all I’ve got this week. Just remember, whether rain or shine, dramatic or scandalous or just some plain ol’ Christmas party lovin’, I will be there. Ciao!