The next time you drive over to Florida to buy a lottery ticket, you commit a bizarre petty crime, the first of many that gets the hashtag “#AlabamaMan” trending. Your lucky lottery numbers are 15-17-33-41-43-60 and Powerball 21.
To protest the new Chick-fil-A at Government Plaza, you debut your new food cart “All-inclusive Safe Space Dogs” (also known as “ASS weiners” to regulars) outside on the sidewalk. Your lucky lottery numbers are 6-30-39-41-51-61 and Powerball 8.
Lacking a production budget, you’ll film a music video for your hot new rap single “Look Mommy, I Did It” on a cellphone at The Wharf’s annual Boat & Yacht show. Your lucky lottery numbers are 21-29-30-44-65-68 and Powerball 17.
You won’t give away your secret recipe at the American Cancer Society’s Chili Cook-Off, but it includes a little TLC with a dash of T-Boz and sprinkle of Left Eye. Your lucky lottery numbers are 1-2-3-4-5-6 and Powerball 7.
Much like you do for the Nappie Awards, you’ll relentlessly call the organizers of this weekend’s Arty Awards to criticize them for the lack of a “Best New Wedding Photographer in Point Clear Who Also Builds Their Own Props” category. Your lucky lottery numbers are 4-11-17-36-54-55 and Powerball 15.
It’s a little disappointing to learn at this stage in your life, but only after attending the Mobile Chocolate Festival will you understand that chocolate milk isn’t made by a brown cow. Your lucky lottery numbers are 1-9-16-30-44-49 and Powerball 18.
Preparing for the repeal of Common Core, you begin to write an essential new textbook you hope to pitch to the state school board next year: “How to Survive on Minimum Wage.” Your lucky lottery numbers are 14-18-23-29-57-63 and Powerball 11.
Inspired to live waterfront after viewing a photo tour of the governor’s beach residence, you’ll finally take the plunge and move into a van down by the river. Your lucky lottery numbers are 8-33-38-51-57-70 and Powerball 5.
Learning about Baldwin County’s low crime rate, you open the first of many successful “Orion’s Honor System Rifles and Power Tools” outlets. Your lucky lottery numbers are 26-31-39-46-55-62 and Powerball 14.
Feeling slighted after not being included in this year’s Gallery of Gardens, you create an entire social media channel devoted to your potted peppers. Your lucky lottery numbers are 19-28-32-35-50-66 and Powerball 3.
Disappointed Mobile was only ranked in the Top 5 Fattest U.S. Cities by renowned weight science organization Wallethub, you begin to binge eat to claim the top spot next year. Your lucky lottery numbers are 13-26-28-39-41-51 and Powerball 6.
Terrified after reading about a man propelled into the water along the Bayway after a car accident, you propose the new I-10 Mobile River bridge contract include air matresses at the water level along its length. Your lucky lottery numbers are 27-30-31-44-49-65 and Powerball 24.
This page is available to subscribers. Click here to sign in or get access.
It looks like you are opening this page from the Facebook App. This article needs to be opened in the browser.
iOS: Tap the three dots in the top right, then tap on "Open in Safari".
Android: Tap the Settings icon (it looks like three horizontal lines), then tap App Settings, then toggle the "Open links externally" setting to On (it should turn from gray to blue).